


chatfic | my sincerest apologies

by bittercrimed



Category: New Dangan Ronpa V3: Everyone's New Semester of Killing
Genre: (attempted) humor, Angst, F/F, F/M, Fluff, M/M, gl if u read this, how to tag, jjkjr
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-07-03
Updated: 2019-07-03
Packaged: 2020-05-28 15:01:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,059
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19396573
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bittercrimed/pseuds/bittercrimed
Summary: named it after jazz hands | (n)drv3 chatficheavily inspired by all those chatfics yo





	1. what have i done

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [The Chaos Family](https://archiveofourown.org/works/17228600) by [StarReads](https://archiveofourown.org/users/StarReads/pseuds/StarReads). 



> if you even SEE me typing "p" into anywhere it means one thing. pregame saihara. somebody get me help i almost love prehara as much as i love normal hara. yes. the despicable version--.

**Yumeno Himiko** started a chat with **Akamatsu Kaede, Amami Rantaro, Chabashira Tenko,** and 10+ others.

**Yumeno Himiko** renamed the chat to **i pronounce you nyeh**

**i pronounce you nyeh** | _8:21 PM | Monday_

**Saihara Shuichi:** Yumeno-san, what?

 **Iruma Miu:** ‘xactly!! fishdick!! whats the purpose of this chat!!!!

 **Ouma Kokichi:** I’m suprised you know what purpose means, you dumbass whore!

 **Iruma Miu:**..?! dumbass wjore?!

 **Yumeno Himiko:** nyeh.. im just gonna ignore that..

**Yumeno Himiko** gave admin rights to **Ouma Kokichi,** **Amami Rantaro**

**Yumeno Himiko:** anyways,, i need help on the math homework!!

 **Yumeno Himiko:** wait what how do i undo that!! my mp is,, low!!

 **Shinguuji Korekiyo:** Kekeke.. How foolish of you, Yumeno-san. I suppose if you gave admin to anybody other than Ouma, it would be okay. You have just put us all in immense danger.

 **Ouma Kokichi:** OOH!! ADMIN RIGHTS!! I always knew I was your faaaavorite, Yumeno-chan!

 **Saihara Shuichi:** Ouma-kun, please no

 **Ouma Kokichi** changed the username of 16 users.

**supreme rat:** im rat overlord, bitches!

 **m-magic is real, senpai-kun..!:** whatever,,!! i just wanted help on the homework!!!!

 **yumeno-chan's stalker:** SORRY I’M SO LATE YUMENO-CHAN!! I had to train!! But I’m here now! And I can help!! I don’t want to risk a DEGENERATE male helping you!!

 **yumeno-chan's stalker:** HAAIYAH! Who was the degenerate who changed my name?! I’m not a stalker!! I’m Yumeno-chan’s—!

 **sherlock but cuter:** Ah, that would be Ouma-kun. Amami-kun isn’t online at the moment.

 **sherlock but cuter:**..Am I supposed to feel complimented? If so, then thank you, Ouma-kun.

 **supreme rat:** You always were my faaavorite, Saihara-chan! But that’s a lie. 

**piano kink:** Come on, Ouma-kun. Be serious.

 **piano kink:** I won't deny what's true.

 **s** **herlock** **but cuter:** I really didn't need to know that/

 **supreme rat:** Oooh, juicy gossip! My favorite!

 **im trying to come up with something other than folklore cunt but:** I do not know what username you have given me, but I am sure it is something completely ridiculous.

**big bro** changed **im trying to come up with something other than folklore cunt but** 's username to **anthropolopeepee**

**supreme rat:** Gooood enough! And hewwo big bwo!

 **cospox? cospox:** Like an older brother dating route, where you have to be all cutesy!

 **supreme rat:** Eww! Amami-chan might be my big bro but he's nowhere neeear as fun as someone else~!

 **anthropolopeepee:** I do not like this. I will retire for the night. Bon nuit.

 **big bro:** I'm almost offended, Ouma

 **dearest mother:** Good evening, everyone. I am sorry that I was so late in coming. Does anyone need assistance?

 **piano kink:** Oh, don't worry Tojo-san! You really should take breaks, anyways :)

 **m-magic is real, senpai-kun..!:** nyeh.. mom, can you help me with the homework :// yukizome-sensei gave us too much ,,

 **sherlock but cuter:** Ah, I wouldn't want to put too much work on Tojo-san. I may not be as smart, but I can help you if you'd like..? 

**yumeno-chan's stalker:** I won't allow it! I want to help Yumeno-san!

 **m-magic is real, senpai-kun..!:** but.. chbashira... ur so bad at math.. and yeah you can help saihara-kun..

 **yumeno-chan's stalker:** uuuuuu

 **supreme rat:** Wow, you must be depressed! Your one true love hates you!

 **sherlock but cuter:** I'm here, Yumeno-san. Please unlock the door.

**m-magic is real, senpai-kun..!:** saihara kun did you not even check.. i never lock my door

 **god is dead:** Yahaa! Gooood evening everyone! Angie has arrived!

 **dearest mother:** Hello, Yonaga-san. Is there anything I can help you with?

 **god is dead:** Atua can still smite you, whoever did this to Angie's username! And no no, Kirumi, Angie is fine. 

**dummy buggy:** Ohbsycsa!! GHsonta nnot reedorealize chat in GontAS chaatas! zFSTSOrry!!

 **baseball racket:** Nah. Don't worry bout it, Gonta. Also, you should get Iruma or Souda to help you.

 **baseball racket:** please. no more. i dont want baseball racket. end me already

 **cospox? cospox:** Hm.. looks like author wants to make me appear more, but doesn't know how to characterize me!

 **cospox? cospox:** I'll just plainly be in more corner.

**big bro:** Looks like she feels the same way about me.

 **big bro:** But she has a better idea of me, plus she likes me more, so I'll be in more :')

 **cospox? cospox:**...:(

 **m-magic is real, senpai-kun..!:** what.. are they talking about :/

 **supreme rat:** Oh, juust leave them alone! They're being suuuper weird :)

**m-magic is real, senpai-kun..!:** if you say so.. nyeh

* * *

**i pronounce you nyeh** _| 2:32 AM | Tuesday_

**big bro:** saihara do u have tthe shit

 **sherlock but cuter:** yeah im here

 **big bro:** good. 

* * *

**i pronounce you nyeh** _| 5:18 AM | Tuesday_

**piano kink:** ??????? Saihara-kun? Amami-kun? What are you guys doing?!

 **supreme rat:** You guys better not become druggies who do crime! I love you with all my heart, Saihara-chan, Amami-chan! 

**yumeno-chan's stalker:** Hey! You guys aren't as degenerate as some of the others, so don't do anything bad!  
**sherlock but cuter:** Guys,, no

 **supreme rat:** Then what were you guys doing? >:(

 **big bro:** It's a surprise.

 **dummy buggy:** NNOOOO! Saihara-kun, Amami-kun, do not drugs!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 **harumaki:** What's going on about Saihara and Amami going on drugs?

 **idiot:** Dunno! Sounded fake, so I ignored it! Saihara, you wouldn't do that, right?

 **sherlock but cuter:** Of course not. ;;

 **big bro:**..Are you guys saying I would? Haha, I would never.

 **big bro:** Anyways, I think this'll be a good place to end off for now. Come back next chapter for what the hell did Saihara and I do?

 **supreme rat:** Awww yeah, you're right. :( We have to go to school. Don't know what you're talking about when you say next chapter though!

 **big bro:** A joke.

**cospox? cospox:** Can't we keep going on longer?

 **red** has entered the chat.

**red:** No. I'm running out of ideas, and the only reason I'm doing this end bit is to increase my word count. 

**red** has left the chat.

**piano kink:** Ugh, I don't even know who that was. Can we just get ready for school now?

 **m-magic is real, senpai-kun..!:** im confused to nyeh,, i agree. lets just go now

 **supreme rat:** O.K! seeee you all at school!


	2. dont got a chance

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fear Atua when he is near.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Knowing exactly what angst will be in the future makes me smile. It’s not in the near. you don’t have to panic yet, but it will soon c o m e. Sorry if the paragraphs ar elong, I'm writing on my laptop so ksk.
> 
> btw, i added some hardgore spoilers about magical girl raising project! it starts after saihara and akamatsus dms, and ends when miu arrives! her username is "i invented my tits"

**i pronounce you nyeh** _| 4:37 PM | Tuesday_

 **dearest mother:** So. Who’s idea was it to have a water gun fight at school?

 **big bro:** Woops.

 **sherlock but cuter:** About that.

 **supreme rat:** for once, it wasnt me ;)

 **piano kink:** Sorry Tojo-san.

 **m-magic is real, senpai-kun..!:** yeah... sorry mom,,

 **big bro:** My idea. Saihara supplied tho

 **dearest mother:** I would expect you two to know NOT to do this. :/

 **supreme rat:** OOF! She just gave you the disappointment face!

 **sherlock but cuter:** Sh, Ouma-kun. Sorry Tojo-san. We just wanted everyone to have fun ;;

 **piano kink:** Wait. Then why were you guys typing so weirdly?

 **sherlock but cuter:** I got lazy. It was late at night.

 **big bro:** his lies. weed

 **cospox? cospox:** SHFLKASJSJSK NO

 **supreme rat:** Wow! I didn’t know you two were into that kind of stuff!

 **sherlock but cuter:** Please, for my sanity, don’t misguide them Amami-kun!

 **big bro:** Okay, okay. I suppose as a brother, I’ll take the role. We really were just lazy, ha.

 **dearest mother:** Please don’t be so immature.

 **god is dead:** Ohh? But Atua sees all! Atua told Angie that Kirumi laughed!

 **dearest mother:** While I respect your religion, Atua is l y i n g.

 **god is dead:** :/

 **god is dead:** You better be glad you're so cute, Kirumi! Nyahaha!（≧∇≦ )

 **supreme rat:** Mom #2!! You're in trouble!! 

**piano kink:** we aren't together..

**dms: aka red <\- sai bean**

**sai bean:** I know you like Yonaga-san. Are you alright?

 **aka red:** aaaaaaaAAA!!

 **aka red:** omg

 **aka red:** shes so cute and sweet and pretty!! but i feel like she likes tojo!! today at school they were chatting and she looked so adorable and happy with her and i dont have a chance because tojos talented and gorgeous and waaaaay better than me

 **sai bean:** Calm down, Akamatsu-san. I'm sure Yonaga-san is just complimenting Tojo-san. Plus, Yonaga-san always looks happy. And Tojo-san is not better than you, nobody is better than anyone.

 **aka red:** youre right.. buUUT AA i would understand it if she does.... all im good for is plAYING piano

 **sai bean:** Don't worry. You're wonderful.

**i pronounce you nyeh** | _4:57 PM | Tuesday_

 **cospox? cospox:** and then she killed la pucelle! im honestly upset?? like snow white deserved better and im going to riot i cant believe hardgore alice died!! she was my favorite! i was gonna cosplay her, go to a con, but now.. ill just be SAD

 **s** **upreme** **rat:** Geez, what are you going on about? You must be a hardcore loser!

 **sherlock but cuter:** Ah, what are we talking about?

 **piano kink:** Oh, didn't I watch that with you Shirogane-san? 

**cospox? cospox:** Oh yeah, you did!! Magical Girl Raising Project! Your favorite was definitely Top Speed, I bet! But she died too. I really, really liked Top Speed! 

**piano kink:** Perfect guess! Top Speed was my favorite! I am upset about that..

 **i invented my tits:** SUP FUCKNUTS  
**i invented my tits:** Miu IIIIruma, in the flesh! Finally arrived!

 **personal charger:** Ah, hello Iruma-san.

 **personal charger:** This is blatantly robophobic! I demand a name change!

  
**supreme rat:** Once you have it, it's there forever! Nishishi!

 **idiot:** Hey, speaking of usernames, I don't like mine! Geez, I'm not an idiot!!!!!!!!!!

 **harumaki:** Sure, idiot.

 **harumaki:** Do you want to die?

 **sherlock but cuter:** ~~yes~~

 **idiot:** Huh?! Bro, what'd you say?! You deleted it too fast!!

 **sherlock but cuter:** Ah, don't worry about it.

 **supreme rat:** Welp! Anyways, we should be asking a more important question!  
**supreme rat:** Where did Angie Yonaga, the Ultimate Artist, disappear off to?

* * *

"Nyaha!" She cheered enthusiastically, finishing the final piece. "Angie hopes this is good enough, Atua!" Her bandage wrapped fingers held the canvas tightly, and she stared at in admiration. "It's pretty." "Atua" smiled in Yonaga's mind. 

Atua didn't exist. Who she'd called a he this entire time, was a she. The voice of her mother was too apparent, far too feminine to be that of a man's. Her mother died, died when she was 10--she prayed to the gods, please, _please_ save her. But they didn't. The artist remembered when she was 7, calling upon her mother to help her, give her another art lesson. It was what Yonaga loved the most. Spending those weekeneds with her mother, drawing away and painting houses, the sun, anything. She remembered when she spent that last day with her, sobbing and holding her cold, lifeless hands. "Mom, mom, _mom,_ " such a desperate call. 

But that was in the past, now.

Atua was her mother, at least to Yonaga. Atua guided her, helped her brush the paint, sculpt her sculptures, and put the pencil down. She couldn't draw, not without the help of Atua. Because Atua was what made her smile. The day she'd turn 11, Atua spoke to her, and she felt warm hands, hugging her--so very much like the late Kaiyama Yonaga. Atua helped her when she'd fallen down, needing a hand to hold. "I'm glad you like it," Yonaga grinned. The girl unlocked her lab door. 

And as she did, her mind wandered over, to the maid, her sandy hair tinted green, her long, black dress, her gentle behavior. Every single one of the girls in her class was beautiful. Akamatsu was so talented, so pretty. Chabashira was more passionate than anyone, absolutely beautiful. Yumeno was adorable, everly sweet. She could go on and on about their beauty, but she had chased after the maid who’d stolen her heart.

Tojo Kirumi, who she could go on and on about her greatness. A smile tainted her lips, absentmindedly hanging the picture on her dorm wall. “There,” she hummed softly, throwing her jacket off with a tired sigh. She grabbed her phone, glancing at the messages. The artist had been participating in the chat earlier, but shut it off so to finish up her commission.

* * *

**dearest mother:** She’s in her room, I believe. 

**god is dead:** Nyahaha! Angie apologizes if she worried any of her friends here, but Angie is okay.

 **sherlock but cuter:** Welcome back, Yonaga-san.

 **big bro:** Not only is god dead, so are we

 **cospox? cospox:** im confuse send help

 **big bro:** :)


End file.
